Maggot in the mouth of madness!

MAGGOT

Well the cab driver was not all there it would seem that he was trying to hide his advanced stages of  Myiasis, this will NOT affect our fare!

Guardian of the Great Muratta

Guardian of the Great Muratta

A Guardian of the Great Muratta came to me softly under the veil of sleep!
Golden were the truths rolled off the lips and tongue of the blessed divine!

"He who seeks the apple will find all that can't be found nor possessed! And With that your journey must end"

"I must have seen at least one million flies this day, blessed are those that squint!"

"You can't rip the skin off the Snake! The Snake must molt the skin! That's the rate that it must happen! Do not tell me that you are, be that which Weems holds in high regard"

"One cannot hold all the water in the palm of ones hands, the soul contains the ocean of eternity"

"Place yourself in the hands of the Great Muratta, Glory to the Great Muratta in the highest! Trust the will of Muratta"

Waking suddenly the first thought I had was that if this "Muratta" was indeed so great why would it need a Guardian such as this!?

Weems must be informed of this visitor and we must be on the road by sun up!

The Magistar of the Cultus Sabbati!!!

Kenny Rogers true form takes some getting used to. A call from Nathan Bixby stirs suspicion in regards to our new guest. I have made arrangements for Nathan to join us, he will prove valuable in a situation such as this!






Vama-marga!

And he shall separate them one from another,

as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats.

And he shall set the sheep on his right,

but the goats on his left.

—Mathew 25: 32-33

Kenny Rogers is in the 5th Dimension!

Kenny Rogers RISE!

Almost as soon as we had taken off I went up to check on Steven to make sure not only could he fly a plane but he indeed knew where we were headed.

During the course of our conversation Steven revealed to me that he was not Steven Seagal but a trans dimensional doppelganger! An ASSASSIN! He must be after Weems! Why did Nathan not detect this? So many questions!!!

Before either of us could react a familiar figure kicked in the door! KENNY ROGERS! A familiar nauseous feeling came over me rendering more useless than I already was. Time seemed to stand still but my mind raced-- my actions seemed to rubber band as I attempted to regain my foot hold but found myself exactly where I was just seconds before.

A cold sweat overtook me as I lost consciousness but as I awoke I was under the shade of an ancient oak tree with Dr. Weems and Kenny Rogers stood over me. Kenny then informed me that he had always been in the 5th dimension and not in the band Kenny Rogers and the 5th dimension BUT Kenny Rogers IN the 5th dimension!

No time for this -- we must gather supplies and regroup!

HOLY SMOKES! STEVE STOLE A PLANE!

OK I think Steven Seagal is a bit over dressed for Ancient Eridu! It appears in the confusion of a anti terrorist drill Steven managed to "acquire" a small jet aircraft. OK mister BIG PRODUCTION I guess we are off and just in time.

RUNNING OUT OF TIME!

Word on the street is that Steven Seagal will be meeting us at the air port! With Weem's condition deteriorating we could be cutting this close. We have made preparations for two weeks I really hope its enough time to bind poor Weems to the prime material plane.

He's not all there man!

Weems! For some reason no matter where Weems is in the house he appears to have one eye always fixed on a faraway location. With the help of Google maps the location was revealed to us, Ancient Eridu!

He must be trying to tell us something!

Weems no longer speaks to us in the words of Man but of beasts. Light whimpers or low growls mostly.

Tomorrow I must get the team together and make preparations to find this Eridu. I might have to call in my favor with the production staff at A&E to get in touch with Steven Seagal he will prove very valuable on this epic of journeys!

Our lady of seven sorrows, Mother of mourning, precious lich...

With Urkku bound by winter's cold grasp we had little if no time to waste. Hot flashes of an aged fever strike me, trembling are the words uttered by the lips of mine "Our lady of seven sorrows, Mother of mourning, precious lich..." and before I could continue came a knock at the door. Light rapping and first but quickly escalating into a rushed pounding.

Door slowly opened cautiously awaiting what could lurk beyond the shadows of the open air.

"Weem is ALIVE!?"

Meat Visions From the Stars!

Late at night feeling the calls of my quest burrito I awoke from meat visions from beyond the stars!

The words HUNGER stings my mind to this day! Could it be a message of spiritual salvation from a strange and alien god hell bent on the corruptions of my innards OR an attempt of possession by a cosmic and sinister force once again hell bent on the corruption of my innards?

Staggering...

Clutching...

In a sweaty near tantric motion I move to where I hear Weems dictating his memoires into a small radio shack Dictaphone or chanting the sacred rites of some bizarre ritual to Urkku?

Urkku? Where have I heard that before?

"Mugggath! Ur-Buloch, Arrrgghh Nofomathu!"

What madness have you caused us Weems! Are you mad with resurrection sickness?

With that Weem's calmed and recovered his monotone monolog. Tomorrow I must inform Bixby of this strange behavior and research this Urkku Weems speaks of.

Now I must exorcise this quest burrito before I too fall under this Urkku's spell.

30 gigs of Ram and a coffee filter!

It took a great deal of time but Nathan and I managed to rescue Dr. Weems from the Astral plane.

Nathan is exhausted and I have ordered him to his quarters for some well deserved rest. Weems is not only once again among friends and safe but dispatches a mean cup of Joe!

Tomorrow I will start to design a device that should get the spirit of Weems into the host body we collected earlier today.

Dr. Weems speaks from beyond the grave!

So this morning during breakfast Nathan and I got a strange message from Weem's via my breakfast cereal. It seems that Dr. Weems is indeed alive and well and being held captive in Peru by a band of shady software pirates.

Immediately Nathan and I made arrangements to head back to South America.

We must hurry if we are to rescue our compatriot!

Dr. Weems update!

It appears that the remains of our beloved Dr. Weems have fallen into the hands of an Aboriginal Hill Tribe known as the Asmat.

According to missionaries operating in the area his urn washed ashore and with the local customs his "Husk" was regenerated and converted into a Bong of Biblical proportions.

We most likely will never see Poor Dr. Weems again.